I Need a Time Out

This week has not gotten off to a very good start, Lily has been grouchy and I have been grouchy and I'm not totally sure who started it off. I am not proud of how I have been handling everything. I knocked my head really hard on the underside of a dresser drawer Sunday night and it still hurts. It seemed like it was just one thing after another last night. The eternal battle that is dinner...Lily wanting dinner suddenly at bedtime and other stall tactics, orange juice on the carpet... Then, when we finally went to brush her teeth the knob to the hot water in the bathroom came off in my hand as I went to turn it on and we had a geyser in our bathroom. I just wanted to cry... I did cry! So did Lily. It was so shocking she is still talking about it. We got drenched and so did everything in the bathroom, and now the faucet needs to be replaced. I guess it's a good thing that happened before they do the smoke test to our sewer line next week! Blessing in disguise? Could be. All I know is - I sure hope everything goes smoothly on our trip to Washington later in the week. This fog of grouchiness needs to lift, and I need a good vacation!

Out of Sorts

So my camera broke the other day. It just stopped working. I tried charging it 3 separate times in different outlets, but it just kept turning off the second I turned it on. It's funny how something like that could put me so out of sorts for the day yesterday. Especially since we have two cameras and it was not the nicest of the two - it was just this was my camera - my little pocket one that Mike got me for Christmas and that I take almost everywhere because I love taking pictures! and when I'm without a camera I seem to miss the best photo opportunities! Not that my camera was the only thing on my mind. It just didn't help... It was one of those days yesterday... But, I called Kodak and it's still under warranty, and I found the receipt!  So I shipped it out last night in the hopes that Kodak will repair or replace it and not claim that I'd dropped it or spilled liquid on it - I can be such a skeptic, especially to big businesses who I think are probably more concerned with their bottom line than being fair to one little customer. But I'm trying to have a little more trust, and anyway it's worth a shot because the cost of shipping is like $10 bucks versus the cost of a new camera.

A little story from my day yesterday: My memory card ended up inside my printer. I took it out during my phone call to Kodak and had - distractedly, trying to get it out of Lily's reach - set it in the printer paper tray. Later, after an hour sorting through old receipts - I found my proof of purchase, my luck was changing!!! I scanned it and went to print it and the paper stuck midway through. 'Stupid printer,' I thought '- this camera warranty thing is cursed!' I pulled out the jam, but the printer light just kept blinking. I opened and closed it, cleared the documents in the queue, unplugged the connection, and it still wasn't working. I looked inside and saw this little tag hanging down that said 'Kodak'. I thought: 'What!? Is this a conspiracy!? This is an HP Printer what is that Kodak tag doing in there!?' Then it dawned on me. Yes, folks - that's how my mind works sometimes. I am embarrassed to admit it, but it was also too funny not to share.

Another story: I decided I would use our other camera and take a couple of quick photos of Lily after her nap - since I happened to dress her in a little outfit I'd made that I hadn't gotten any great pictures of. (The only picture I had was of her crying at her cousins birthday party in it when she was feeling pretty rotten having missed her nap and being sick.) Anyway, I haven't made Lily much in the way of clothes so I figured I should get a picture of it. I fixed her hair all cute to match and just as we headed downstairs I got a phone call. My mom wanted me to look something up for her online that she couldn't because she didn't have the internet out visiting my Grandma. I get off the phone with a dilemma - do I look that up and call her right back, or take the pictures first? It won't take long to look it up and I don't want to keep her waiting. Just as Lily and I head out back with me still on the phone with my mom - Mike gets home from work. I am always thrilled to see him, of course, and so is Lily, but as she runs excitedly up to him she notices dangling from his arm in a plastic bag - ice-cream! Well, I am normally as thrilled to see ice-cream as Lily was, but she hadn't had lunch yet and I was on a mission to secure a picture. Mission terminated. Lily jumped excitedly up into her booster chair as she never will do for a meal, but the second she comprehends that she cannot have ice-cream until after lunch.. "Lunch - YUCK!" she jumps back down, and since I am in her path and she's mad...kicks me in the shins! Time out. No happy pictures happening here. Well, not in that moment. I couldn't help but think: 'Was this outfit cursed too?' Of course not. Things calmed down a little bit later (thanks largely to my wonderful husband) and I snapped a few happy pictures of my ladybug. Made this to cover a stain on the front of the shirt with some old polka-dot fabric my mom had lying around. It was just in time for Isaac and Audrey's big bug Birthday bash :)

Birthday bugged

Ice-cream happy, but before my camera has the time to focus...

YUCK!

 YUCK is right.

 Dad is the best!

Happy Again

Those last three were from us goofing around later that night. I love my girl - don't think she's always acting out. She's a really good kid. :)

Anyway, my camera is out for repairs. I'll let you know how it turns out, because it was really a great little camera for the price and sometimes took just as good or better photos as our expensive Fuji one. I hope they will fix it!!!

I'm Lily!

 

Lily has recently become very sensitive to her sense of self. She's Lily. Anything else you might suggest is contradicted in the most scornful tones! 'I'm not ____, I'm Lily!' 'Not cute' 'Not a girl', 'not a baby' (which makes mom kind of sad), 'not a doctor', not a bunch of other funny things I can't remember, and today 'not normal'. Ha ha.

 

Lily has been quite a bit crankier than usual the past few days which I am hoping is due to the fact that she's been sick, and not to the fact that she's 2 years old. If it's the latter - we have a long year ahead of us. So you know I'm not being too harsh with any of the following statements I will preface them with the fact that my daughter is one of the number 1 loves in my life, and I genuinely like being her mom - most of the time... Sometimes she can be pretty aggravating and I have the desire to just get as far away from the sound of her whining as I possibly can. Of course, I can't just leave her alone to possibly hurt herself, and if I did just completely ignore her I'd feel guilty and sorry for the poor darling within a few minutes and be back in the room trying to make her happy again. OK - so that wasn't so harsh. Sometimes when she's clinging to me while I'm washing dishes I am just longing for the day when that phase will pass. Seriously I will have no sentimental longing for that outgrown habit to return, because she pushes her way in-between my body and the cabinet determined to squeeze into a space that is not there - so that I am forced uncomfortably away from the sink and she is forced uncomfortably into the cabinet drawer handles pointy ends - whining and crying louder the entire time. She really can't stop it soon enough! Just so you know Lily, if you read this in the future: every kid gives their mom some kind of grief, and that doesn't mean you love them any less! A habit I do miss that has been repeated over the last couple of days is rocking her in the glider chair! My sweet baby! She is getting too big for it to really be comfortable, but I love to cuddle her so!

I just feel at a loss sometimes about how to deal with a wall of No's! And that shift from asking me for something specific to freaking out when the very thing she asked for is being presented to her! There is no reasonable approach to take with a person who is acting completely unreasonable! Most of the time when she freaks out - I just ignore it, figuring no response can't be very encouraging for her to continue acting that way.... She's a pretty persistent kid, however. And she's so smart! She's already got down the trick of asking another adult if one says no. Well now that her temperature is back to normal I must be feeling less sorry for her, because I found myself giving her a little attitude crackdown. When the whiny crying voice comes out I am meeting it with counting and timeouts. Let's just hope she gets the connection and I don't waste the effectiveness of the timeout.

She's a good kid - don't get me wrong! I know she's just trying to assert her independence and find out where we'll draw the line. We'll find out together.

On a lighter note: We've been taking Lily's temperature so often over the last couple of days she's added it to her vocabulary. She says it 'temper-picture.' Last night her dad's 'temper-picture' was '40 dollars.' 

Another thing I know I'll miss is how Lily always seems like my baby again when I pull her onto my shoulder and wrap her up in towels after a bath. She always hugs me and usually says 'I love you mama!' I just bought her some new towels - we've been using the same hooded baby ones since she was born and they've gotten far too small...but she looked so like my little baby again wrapped up in them I've been having a hard time letting them go. Oh well, new memories to make coming up!

Just because

Most of you don't get to see this side:  

Having a baby is not all smiles. (It totally caught me off guard how hard it is - as anyone who saw me in those first few months could probably tell!) However, as I went through my photos of Lily to find these grouchies it totally made me smile! She's my angel and always will be through good times and bad. I'm lucky to have such a good happy kid, she really is a sweetheart a majority of the time. It occurred to me one day..."When you're having a bad day with your little one - just remember: at least you know how to wipe your own butt." I think we sometimes forget how rough kids have it. Yeah their job is to play all day and they don't have to clean up most of their messes, but it's tough being small and having to rely so much on someone else, and to adapt to so much that is new and constantly changing. I definitely tend to have a hard time with that last one. Kids are amazing in so many ways and it's no surprise the Savior counseled us to be like children.

I'm so thankful to have Lily for a daughter. Today has been especially enjoyable. I think with the medical issues I've been going through, and knowing I won't get to be around her all next week :( it's just in my mind to kiss and hug, and enjoy her as much as I can these next few days. I love this little girl!