VACATION!

 It's settled :) We've been planning a tent camping trip with some friends to Yosemite for months now, but thought a rainy/snowy forecast might keep us from taking our 21 month old daughter on one of her first few trips away from home. A 7-hour drive is going to be hard enough - we don't want her first real outdoor experience to be cold and miserable. But we haven't had a good vacation in a really long time! Booked a little cabin and we're going rain, snow or shine! So excited to get away and into the woods! I can't wait! Possibly even more excited to have a bed and heat and a bathroom to retreat to! Yippee!

Thinking Too Much Can Make Your Brain Implode

Something a friend said made me think about this today…and I decided: Sometimes I enjoy things more after-the-fact than in-the-moment. There are times where for some reason I stress out when I should just be enjoying what’s going on. I have found myself in the middle of some activity that should be really fun just waiting for it all to be over. Don't get me wrong - it's not all the time... But too often I let myself get caught up in either the shoulda, coulda, woulda, fear for what could go wrong, distracted by someone's downer comment, or feel responsible for other people having a good time so much that I don’t have as good a time myself. Why can’t I just relax!?

When I do have one of those pure joy in the moment experiences they are amazing! You know the type of feeling where you just feel good and outside thoughts aren't distracting you. When that feeling comes I just savor it and try to hold on to it and make it last. I have had some practically perfect days. My wedding day, for one. That day it didn’t matter that the bridesmaids dresses weren’t the color I wanted or the reception wasn’t held outside with Chinese lanterns and a dance floor like I’d always imagined. I didn't even notice that my hair had become a rat's nest even when a sweet sister from my ward drove all the way back to her house to bring back a curling iron for me. I wasn't thinking about my hair! I was in love, surrounded by people I loved, and everything was golden. Joy just bubbled up inside of me and spilled out all over everything. Some other times I’ve had that all is right with the world at this moment kind of feeling it has been so random – like dusting my mother’s end table in the sunshine. I know - I'm weird :)

Writing this out I think I just need to make sure I focus on love and not little details. To try not to multi-task so much and give myself more time to meditate. And not worry so much about what might be bugging other people, or what could go wrong before it does, but wait and deal with it if anything even does go wrong! (I tend to try to be way too prepared. -- So what if I forget my toothbrush on a trip! That is probably the easiest thing to replace and chances are I was due for a new one anyway.) I do not want to think about worst-case-scenarios or even best case-scenarios anymore! I don’t want to feel like I have to be perfect right now. I just want to live and be happy! Where does all this pressure and expectation come from, anyway? A million different directions. Ugh. Life is too complicated. How am I supposed to let go when I still have desire to attain things, to work, and to serve? There is no simple solution. I can't let go, but I will try to focus on joy. I am lucky to have some pretty great sources of it in my life.

Miss Potato Head

True chocolate delight

Mike thinks these kind of pictures are gross, but it cracks me up. Look at the joy on that face! That is the power of chocolate, people!

Where Go Easter Go?

This is what Lily has been saying ever since Mike hid her basket and plastic eggs away a couple of days after Easter.

She would probably still be carting it around if we let her. She keeps asking to hunt Easter eggs whenever anything reminds her about it.

Holidays are so much more fun with a little one around. It was so fun to fill Lily's basket with goodies and see the delight on her face with each fun new thing.

 
(I must admit dyeing eggs with her was not so fun...maybe next year)

Lily told Mike as they were playing with her Easter goodies in the hall.."I like bunnies!" As little sense as a candy-bringing, egg-laying bunny makes mixed up with our true reason to celebrate Easter...it was so fun :)

We let Lily do a pre-hunt Sunday morning to practice so she wouldn't be totally left behind when her older cousins were dashing around later in the afternoon. Here's a little bit of it - edited so that Grandma won't be embarrassed to be seen by all the world in her PJ's :)

Lily only had 12 eggs to practice with but she got the hang of it right away. I was impressed!

Gearing up for the big hunt! Note the look of intense concentration.

I wouldn't be surprised if in the afternoon hunt Lily actually found more eggs than her older cousins! ...but we will never know because she had more fun sorting them over into Audrey's basket than opening them up for the prize inside!

...I have a feeling that that sort of generosity will end with this year!

I don't think Isaac picked up as many eggs, because he was mostly interested in opening them up... so it probably evened out. We didn't bother to sort them out or count them except to make sure none were left outside.

I love general conference. I thought it might be kind of strange having general conference on Easter weekend because - for one: you get a pretty Easter dress and then don't have any place to wear it, and - more importantly: mixing up all these activities could make it pretty busy... and would I get a chance to listen? It was busy, but it was great! Having conference playing in the house brought the spirit more in the midst of all our fun activities of the weekend than it might otherwise have had. There was no way I could not think about the Savior listening to His prophets speak. And then the Earthquake in the middle of Easter dinner just made me think about Him more!
 

I couldn't resist putting Lily in a springtime dress even if we weren't going anywhere. (She looks so comfortable, doesn't she? Hee hee ) I tried to get a family photo, but the sun was so bright and Lily was so squirmy I wasn't really thrilled with how any of them turned out. Oh well...

I think my favorite photos of the day were of these two cute cousins playing in the dirt. 

 Not exactly a planned Easter activity, but where there is dirt to dig it is hard to keep these girls away!

Close Cousins

Lily and her cousin Audrey who is almost exactly a year younger.

Audrey is just starting to sit up and they were so cute together!

At one point it looked like Lily was going to go in for a sweet hug, but then she got concerned about her shoes. Such is the life with a toddler. Everything is 'Mine!' and the littlest thing can disturb -or appease them. I just noticed Lily's shoes were a little extra colorful here due to Play-Doh stuck to the soles. Ha ha.

Audrey is seriously so happy almost all of the time. What a smile! She is so adorable.

  
"To Friends!"

  

 

  

Not So Hip..

Hippity Hip Hop.

So yeah, I'm a dork, but I don't try to hide it. If you didn't know, please understand it can take me a while to warm up to being a dork around you. Unless you just have one of those personalities that bring it out, which you probably know if you do... But this is much much beside the point of this post. Which was...what was it again..?

Do I need a point? I am blogging here! Much more than that - I am up past Lily's bedtime (for once in I can't remember how long)! Awake and feeling ok and doing something for no good reason!

So in case you were wondering what all that hip hopping is about, that is my weird way of letting you know that I actually took more than one Easter photo, but I am not going to be posting them at this time. Something for you to look forward to. I am awake past 9:30, but I am not about to pull an all-nighter. How is it that I am not even halfway through the month of April with more pictures than the first couple of months that Lily was born??? Because I learned my lesson! I must have been complaining the other day about how many pictures I need to go through because Mike suggested I not take so many. Ha! He's been glad to have them to look back on and he admits to it.

Anyway, life these days feels like we are bouncing back and forth between feeling good and feeling crummy. That is my current excuse for my lack of socializing and my ever growing to do list. I feel like we haven't had time in-between to catch our breath. Will we ever? I must admit sometimes I consider letting it all go. All the little unnecessary things that we add to our lists because we want to, but which sometimes cause more stress than they are worth. The unfortunate thing is those very things are the things we do for fun - to give ourselves, and maybe our families a little extra enjoyment. The spice to life! ...The secret is how much to include. I do not pretend to know. Often time takes care of items on my list before I can.

Other times things that were never even on my list fill my time. (Like feeling crummy.) One of the 'more fun' examples (don't you just think 'funner' even though it screams at you that it's wrong!) Is this:

I was playing tea party with Lily and thinking about using this box:

..for a stove, when I thought: I can do better than this! So got a little construction paper, and a whole lotta packaging tape and spent the day building this:

Probably not the most constructive use of my time..but I had fun! I must admit I can get kind of tired of repeatedly pretending to drink out of empty cups, even if my companion toasts: "To Friends!" in the cutest way! She tired of my construction job sooner than I did, and was cooking with it well before it was through, but I was happily entertained for an entire day, and now Lily has a little stove to heat up her cocoa! All from items around the house: No additional materials were purchased in the making of this stove.

Here Lily is modeling it's many features!

 
Notice she even tried a roast lamb! Dual purpose lovey/dinner. No worries - Lamby is still kicking. Well, sleeping probably. I am headed that way myself.

Happy Easter!!!